Moving Out 4/4

Moving Out 3/4

Moving Out 2/4

Moving Out 1/4

25 Things I've Learned in 2 Years

[Tony] It is incredible to think that we have been doing intentional community in Dayton's Bluff for almost two years now. I couldn't begin to try to recapture everything that we have seen, learned, and experienced while we've been here. For me, the last two years have consisted of some of the most profound and transformational experiences of my life. I have grown immensely from who I was when we started and I'm glad that I've grown enough to now realize how much more I have to learn. Nevertheless, I recently sat down and started a list of some of the most important things I have either learned or experienced over the last two years here at Ekklesiah. This list is in no way exhaustive, but its a start. Maybe I'll follow it up with another one soon enough. But, for now, my top 25:

1.We don't have to “bring” God anywhere, God is already there.
2.Love is incredibly disarming and its power should never be underestimated
3.Whether we think we do or not, we all drag around a large bag of stereotypes and biases
4.Becoming aware of our own biases, stereotypes, privileges, and assumptions can be extremely difficult, sometimes painful, but so worth it!
5.Kids just want to be kids... and so do we, lets go find some chalk!
6.Jesus is desperately in love with homosexuals!
7.Community empowers the individual to accomplish more than they ever could on their own
8. We must learn to love by seeking and learning from the heart of God
9.While we learn to love, we will make mistakes. Part of loving is knowing that we will all make mistakes and that love is most powerful when it keeps on loving through them, unconditionally. People are beautiful, no matter how broken.
10.Church is so much more than a group of people who sing songs and listen to a pastor together on Sunday mornings.
11.We all contribute to the brokenness of our world, lets not be so fast to point our fingers at who is “right” and who is “wrong,” instead, lets accept that we've all contributed to the mess and figure out ways to help each other begin rebuilding
12.My most powerful worship experiences, my most intimate interactions with the Holy Spirit, and my most genuine impressions of “church” have come on the streets with hustlers, dealers, thugs, single mothers, addicts, the poor, the marginalized, and the forgotten. Given the number of times this truth is mentioned in scripture, this should surprise no one.
13.Jesus can throw a party that you will never forget.
14.Together, we actively choose what we want our world to look like
15.Always give God his props, he most definitely deserves it! Glory, honor, power, and praise to God!
16.Prayer matters
17.When Jesus says “bear your cross and follow me” he isn't kidding.
18.Let yourself by “interruptable,” most of the time the Spirit moves in ways that we don't expect. You wont regret it.
19.There is nothing more important than our relationship with God and relationships with other people
20.We desperately need each other
21.We are not called to be extraordinary on our own, we are called to be normal and to acknowledge our weaknesses because it is in our weakness that Jesus turns ordinary into extraordinary
22.Jesus is still alive. The Gospels are still good news. And Jesus is restoring everything- right now!
23.A simple life creates more space to be filled by God
24.God could completely restore the world right now if he wanted to, it is a blessing that we don't deserve that he would rather use us to bring forth restoration through relationships with us.
25.We have no idea what we are capable of as a force of truth, love, and restoration in this world: each one of us is wonderfully and fearfully made. Jesus knows we can walk on water. Most of the time we just don't really believe Him.

Good News and Ordinary Extraordinary People

[Tony] So, I love my seminary classes because of the things that I get to write about. I recently wrote a paper emphasizing the imperative need to address Christian social ministry within the context of community, arguing that an approach to Christian social ministry that occurs outside of the collective body of believers is inherently extremely limited in its ability to pursue deep, holistic social ministry. Anyway, I want to share the conclusion to this particular paper as it reminded me so much of the gift that God has given to us through the community that has been the heart of Ekklesiah. This is a response to a book by Derrel Watkins- to clarify the mention of the name in the paragraph below. Above all, writing this reminded me of how much I have fallen in love with the people I get to "do" community with, share in Christ with, and live out good news of eternal life that starts now with. Enjoy!
"To be a Christian is to believe that both Christ and the Gospels are still alive and relevant. The “good news” of Christ is not simply news of life after death, instead it is news of life before death, heaven on earth. It is news that through Christ, God is currently establishing His kingdom on earth as it is in heaven. The “good news” is news that is relevant now. Christian social ministry must see itself as an element of Christ's community of believers. As Christians, we are all called to collectively share the burden of “social ministry” however, it must also be understood that “social ministry” refers to the social repercussions of many living within the world but not of it, identifying themselves as the living body of Christ who is still bringing good news to the poor, is still proclaiming liberties to the captives, still recovering the sight of the blind, still setting at liberty those who are oppressed, and still proclaiming the year of the Lord's favor. The Christian community, like Jesus' original disciples, is not called to be extraordinary on its own, limited by a prerequisite of ability and skill. Instead, those within the community are called to be ordinary men and women made extraordinary through Christ. Watkins fails to acknowledge that within the single entity of the Christian community, whether we are marked by prolific need or by a substantial ability to give generously, we are all called to participate in social ministry. Social ministry within the Christian community perceives the least within it, the “client,” as the greatest asset. The “client” is the identity of Christ, for it is in the presence of the “client” that we interact most intimately with the presence of Christ."

PRAYER REQUESTS

summer brings the opportunity to get moving often and rapidly. we merely wanted to share some items with our community in hopes that as a larger group we can be lifting up one another.

Please Pray for the interactions that Kaleb Greene has on a daily basis at Big Sandy Camp. May strength be provided to him [in all forms] and may his actions be a reflection of Jesus.

Please Pray for Ryan's journey in Thailand. May Ryan's heart be altered in ways that he will never be the same again after these experiences in Thailand.

Colton Long has joined the house for this summer season. We Pray for the opportunities he has during his internship at the MN Court of Appeals and also hope he is blessed by his short stay @ Ekklesiah.

Finally, Please pray for Ekklesiah in general. An large, long transition phase is already underway. Right now we really don't know what the end of the transition looks like. But we ask for prayer for what this transition means for us individually and for the community in totality. Shalom.

"I Saw A Sliver Of Jesus' Heart"

[Nathanial] I was administering a standardized writing exam for a fifth grader who did not speak English as his primary language at home. He had a question that asked him whether he would like to learn to play the guitar or the drums. He chose the guitar. The exam then asked this student to write two reasons why he chose this instrument. The student responded in this way:

1) I would learn to play the guitar so that I could teach other littler kids to play the guitar.
2) And I would learn to play the guitar because my mom wants me to show her how to play chords on the guitar.

Watching this student write this response was deeply humbling. I wanted to scream at him, [sarcastically], "Try and be a little more selfless!!!" Absolutely no part of his response is for his own personal gain. His motivations were purely for the eventual benefit of OTHER PEOPLE! That day, I caught a little glimpse of the heart of Jesus Christ (: Shalom.

2nd Annual FREE YARD SALE

2nd Annual Free Yard Sale!
Saturday, June 19th, 2010
8:00 a.m. – 5:00 p.m.

243 Bates Ave.
Saint Paul, Mn 55106

What: A free yard sale is, well, exactly what it sounds like. Its like any other garage/yard sale, except everything is free! We will be accepting donated “sale items” throughout the week prior to the event. Last year we had quite a spectrum of items. We are really looking for anything that you would otherwise sell in a garage/yard sale. Clothes (in good condition), books, furniture, music, kids toys, sports stuff, shoes, purses, electronics, appliances... anything that you don't need anymore, don't need anymore, or you really just think you could live without! (please bring any large items and furniture the morning of the sale)

We'll take all of the donations and spread them out on the lawn. Then, we'll spend the rest of the day making friends, hanging out, and sharing in the gifts we've been given. Bring some stuff to give away, bring a lawn chair, and come hang out!

Oh, and this year's Free Yard Sale is also the Love: St. Paul event for the month of June at the Gallery Covenant Church!

Why? A free yard sale is kind of an experiment in a lot of things. Ekklesiah is all about reconsidering the ways we live life. We like to get a little alternative. We're learning to love a little more radically. We're searching for ways to make how we live our lives every day look more like Jesus. Ekklesiah is also all about getting creative with how we understand “church”. What does it look like for a bunch of not-so-perfect, extremely ordinary, extremely human people to be the living breathing body of Christ? How do those people live together? What do those people do together? What does that mean for the world around us? (I mean, the gospel is good news, right? So shouldn't the church be the living gospel? Good news for the world?) Another reason we do the Free Yard Sale every year is because we believe in helping out our neighbors. Our neighborhood in Dayton's Bluff is home to many who are struggling to get by. Many of the people who came to our Free Yard Sale last year were people who took things that they actually really needed- clothes, a nicer pair of shoes, a decent couch. We like to imagine what the world would look like if we cared as much about our neighbor's wellbeing as much as our own.

Hope to see you there!

A Strange Contrast
[Nathanial] This morning I had the experience of making my first court appearance. It was just appealing an address change on my license, but the law processes I encountered shed a surprising reminder on eternity.

Essentially, I agreed to pay additional money for the opportunity to have a former traffic offense wiped off my personal record. Again, let me clarify, I paid for the opportunity for legal redemption. Only under the stipulation that I maintain proper behavior [and don't repeat offenses] for the next year can I then be rewarded with a clean slate. I understand that this is a little corny, but I couldn't help but think of Jesus Christ as I drove away from the district court this morning.

Man, I am thankful that God's grace is unconditional! knowing that I just PAID for a form of forgiveness really made me appreciate what Jesus did on the cross a little more. How contrary to humanity and earthly society was Jesus' act? Somebody ELSE "paid" for all those offenses. Somebody ELSE took care of it all for me! How amazing is that!!! Merely a nice reminder on a sunny drive to school today. Shalom.

We Want To Hear From You!

[ Tony ] So, I'm gonna try to turn the tables a little...

As a community, all of us at Ekklesiah have learned so much about the value of listening to the voices of the community that surrounds us. If we are a community together, if we are committed to doing life together, and doing it in an incarnational way, then we should be able to trust in the perpectives of those we do community with. We all know, and are thankful, that Ekklesiah is a community that is much more extensive than simply the five of us who live together here in St. Paul. I know there are many of you who read our blog who do know us, and know some of us very well. I know that many of our readers are people who we regularly share life with – many of you are people who cannot go without mention in the story of what Ekklesiah is, has been, and is becoming.

So, first, I want to express a deep thankfulness for the support that we have from so many, whether its through furniture in our house, to spiritual mentoring, to encouragement, to prayer – all of it is a blessing from God, and we thank God for you.

Second, I want to do something new. The point of this post is to get your responses to some questions. In your interactions with Ekklesiah, what are some healthy ways that you would challenge us as a community to dive deeper into life in community? What are some ways that Ekklesiah can serve to a greater capacity? As a community, what kinds of things does Ekklesiah do well and not so well? If you could sit the five of us down all at once and give us one piece of advice/knowledge, what would you say? Do you have any tangible ideas as to how Ekklesiah can have a greater presence in the Dayton's Bluff neighborhood? Do you have any tangible ideas as to how Ekklesiah can serve the larger Church to a greater capacity? Is there anything Ekklesiah does that you don't understand or have a hard time with? What kinds of things have you learned about God, about yourself, about other people, about community, about church, etc. from your interactions with Ekklesiah?

Thats a lot of questions, I know. I don't expect anyone to answer all of them – but we'd love it if someone actually tried! Please consider the questions above. If any of them stick out to you, please let us know what you are thinking / feeling. As a community, we understand that life together in Christ requires a great deal of listening and learning. We value the discerning power of community and we truly want to hear the perspectives of those we do life with.

There is a “COMMENT” button at the bottom of this post. If you wish to answer one or some or all of the questions above, please use the COMMENT feature and answer away! The best part of using the COMMENT button is that you actually have the option to post responses anonymously –

Looking forward to your input!

Oh, we also reserve the right to respond to your comments. That doesn't mean we have any desire whatsoever to debate or argue over anything. We value open dialogue. Mutual learning starts there...

Prayer Walk Questions II

Prayer Walk Questions

Matthew 18:2-5

[Nathanial] Last week I was asked to assist in chaperoning a sixth grade class on a work shift to the organization "Feed My Starving Children." While this organization has a foundation in Christian ideas, it was really unique to share this experience in a complete non-church setting. While singing "Thriller" with a couple of the boys was fun, the most amazing part of this experience happened afterwards. The sixth graders were all asked to write reflective letters. Two boys wrote their leters specifically to me and it is through their words that I found a beautiful nugget of hope in an otherwise stressful day at school. May their words inspire your hearts as well:

"Dear Mr. Nathanial,
I learned how to use the machines. I also learned that a lot of people die of starvation. Did you know that we packed 14,040 packages? This expereince will help me know I save a lot of kids. I will now volunteer alot of places now. Sincerely, J."

"Dear Mr. Nathanial,
On our field trip to Feed My Starving Children we packed 14,040. We packed enough food that we helped feed 38 children for a year. I had fun and we helped alot of people. I learned that you can have fun and help alot of kids. I also learned that the food they send was good and not so bad. This will affect my life by me feeling satisfide of what I did and how many kids are happy. Sincerely, JRD."

Matthew 18:2-5.
Frieden.

We party, we serve, we worship, we live, we do life, together

[Tony] There was a weekend not long ago that began with a bachelor party. This was a bachelor party for a fellow saint, whose upcoming wedding was highly anticipated as a union of two hearts given to God. The weekend began with a bachelor party (during which we engaged in stimulating discussion at our local library, followed by a fun night of Chutes and Ladders and Kool-aid =) and that bachelor party consisted of a crew of gentlemen who I would have never known had I not been a member of my church. We stayed out late, partied like we should have, celebrated thoroughly, and then hit the sack, exhausted, but filled with joy. Some of us went home. Some of us actually stayed at one another's homes for the night, drinking in every opportunity to be together with friends. The next morning, most of those who had been part of the bachelor party the night before reconvened with others from our church for a service project, cleaning up a park. We spent the morning together, serving the environment and the community, reminiscing about the night before, and telling stories to everyone else that was serving with us. After the service project, we all departed our separate ways. Most of us ended up napping through the afternoon. I got to go home to a house full of brothers in Christ. Then, to end our weekend, we all came together again. This time, as on every Sunday, we spent our evening at church, celebrating everything that God has done and is doing, the relationships that we have, and this life that is such a blessing to live in Him.
So, after telling you about this particular weekend, I pose the following question: what does the body look like? Is the body simply a group of people who meet at a particular church on Sundays? Is the body a group of people with separate lives, who don't know each other's names, who come to church, listen to a sermon, and sing a few songs? Or, is the body a way of life? Is the body something that is alive, that moves together, that not only does church together but does the everyday things of life together as well? The highlight of my weekend was the realization that, as a body, we partied together and celebrated each other, then we served together, then we worshiped God together. What does it look like for the church to be a body that does life together?
We party, we serve, we worship, we live, we do life, together.

Find Hope, Brothers

[Tony]---- A quick note of hope to my brothers at Ekklesiah.
In response to the times we find that community can also be messy----

Sometimes its difficult to see where and how God is moving in our lives not because He is far away or has taken a more distant seat, but rather because he is so close that He goes unnoticed. The winter has been long and is finally beginning to show signs of loosening its grip. We have spent a lot of time inside the house together over the last few months- a gift that cannot go unnoticed. I have watched God use the time that we have had, cooped up in the house on cold nights, to mold us, to shape us, to make us face up to some of the most vulnerable places of ourselves, our pasts, our presents, and each other, and ultimately, to grind us together and hammer us, like a blacksmith, into His sword. We go to these places, standing in the recognition of pain and struggles and change, because they are worth it- because in the end, the thing that God is shaping us into is a single body that looks like Him and His Kingdom. As we work through our most human struggles, we learn along the way that we struggle together, and that we find each other there, recognizing each person's truest and deepest nature, and ultimately, finding God in one another. Our struggle does not go in vain, and does not go unnoticed by our father in heaven. We push through because we love each other that much, because God has showed us how to love that deeply. Even though there has not been a lot of movement as of late as a community, doing things together outside of the house, I promise you that God is using this time, and had planned on this time, to push us, to train us, to ready us for the ministry that He has called us to. Transformational ministry outside of our doors is not an easy endeavor, on our streets, there is tremendous amounts of pain, anger, violence, neglect, hate, and lack of hope. To go there, we must be one- we must be one in each other and we must be one in God, as a body. In order to fit together as tightly and as firmly as we need to, we must be broken, reshaped, casting aspects of ourselves aside, shuffling off the layer of stone that covers the hearts God longs to shape. In order to fit together, we must cast away our layers of stone and let our hearts be revealed. Let your walls fall away. As a community we are being remade in the image of God, just like the first time each one of us first freely gave our hearts to Him. We shed layers of the stone that was formed on us and gave our hearts to God. Now, as a community, we are doing it again. Remember how difficult, but how beautiful the giving of ourselves to God for the first time was. I promise it will be that beautiful again.
Have hope in your brothers and find hope in your brothers. We have each been called, by God the Creator, to the same mission, to the same objective. God's Kingdom is being made more present and tangible on earth as it is in heaven every single day in our house and the community that we share. I see it manifesting, I see its roots growing deeper and I see its branches bearing so much fruit. May we, as a community, find a place in the comfort, trust, and unconditional love we have for one another, to become more fully human, and to grow to unfathomable depths in our relationships with God. May God use us to change our world before our eyes and may our eyes be open to recognizing the beauty and glory of what we are seeing- the Kingdom of Heaven on earth. May God open our eyes to see the fruits of our labor in one another. May we set our desire on a thirst for knowledge of deeper relationship, deeper love, and deeper faith. May God set the truth in each of your hearts that you are loved deeply by your brothers and that God is pleased at our obedience and pleased to work in and through us for His glory. May God open your hearts to find hope in these things as I have. Jesus is alive my dudes! Jesus is alive! May we be the vessels through which God reveals this truth to his beloved creation!
Through Jesus, humanity is being remade. God is restoring us and our world to a place of right relationship, as we speak. Here's a vision to dwell on: God is redefining the way in which humanity lives and what it lives for. Through Jesus, God has given us a glimpse of what that life may look like. Through the Holy Spirit, God is making it possible for us to give that same glimpse, that same hope, that same picture of a different life, a different world, a different way to live and to love to each other. There is a new world, growing, becoming, right here, right now, in the midst of the old one we see all around us. Ekklesiah is a picture of that new world. We are a picture of that new way. Let it be that in everything that we do, every word that we say, and every breath that we take, the Kingdom of God becomes so real that you can touch it. Do not be afraid to lift your eyes to greater things. Do not be afraid to dream about a better way. Do not be afraid to let your life, your hands, your feet, your love for others become a glimpse of a better way, a better world, of tangible restoration. You have been remade! You bear the likeness of the one who has saved you.

“But we have this measure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us. We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted but not forsaken; struck down, but now destroyed; always carrying in the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies. For we who live are always being given over to death for Jesus' sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifest in our mortal flesh. So death is at work in us, but life in you.” 2 Cor. 4:7-12

“Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent His only Son into the world, so that we might live through Him. In this is love, not that we have loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another, God abides in us and His love is perfected in us.” 1 John 4:7-12

what a week, 2nd ed.

[Nathanial] *sigh* God showed up again, in profound ways. This past week has included another series of events that can only be attributed to some of the sneaky ways God is orchestrating this journey before me. Observe:

The biggest event of my past week occurred as I was driving to Gallery last Sunday. I pulled up to an intersection in Dayton’s Bluff and allowed a pedestrian to pass in front of my vehicle. It seemed pretty apparent that this man was homeless. As I made my left hand turn, the thought ran through my head, “You could stop and invite this man into your car. You could have him join you for church this morning. Then you could take him out to lunch after church.” Unfortunately, I did nothing except keep driving. The further I drove away from this man, the more my heart pounded with these thoughts. It created a church service that was spent inside my own head wrestling. I continued to wrestle with this missed opportunity and another conviction that occurred during church throughout all of Sunday afternoon and evening. I wrestled so much that I got a migraine! The internal turmoil continued all through Monday. Interactions among our house members further twisted my heart to a point where I had a very difficult time falling asleep!
As the week wore on, I was able to process through these feelings and thoughts I had been having. One of my very wise roommates reminded me to acknowledge how God is redefining my heart. There is something very special when this type of heart change can be observed in a tangible way. If I had passed this homeless man even just one year ago, I would not have had the same experience. Through my time here at Ekklesiah, God is truly forming my heart a little more like His own. Please keep praying that the hearts of Ryan, Tony, Stash, Kaleb, & Nathanial continue to be molded and shaped into the Heart of God!

Well, God wasn’t finished with me yet. On Wednesday of this past week, He stopped me dead in my tracks again. I was working with an 8 year old nina at school and near the completion of our lesson together; she wanted to draw something on the chalkboard. Since she had worked so diligently that particular morning, I allowed her to go hog wild. She began to tell me about the new home her family moved into recently. She began to draw an apartment building. She included some windows and a door. Then, my friend told me the reason her family moved was because the house right next door belonged to her Tio [uncle in Spanish]. Here were her next comments: “My Tio’s house is right here. He has a lot of grass. We have a little grass, but my Tio has BIG grass.” She proceeded to grab the green chalk and scribble relative plots. It is in this comment where God hit me with a greyhound bus. The single thing most important to my friend, the thing that meant the most to her was grass! she repeated it four times! GRASS! It was such a jaw-breaking reminder of the beauty of simplicity that my eyes welled up with tears, right in the middle of my work day! It is my prayer that what we come to value really are the simple things like grass and that we might not be worried about the unnecessary or unimportant things to our Creator.

Nope, God still wasn’t done with me this past week. Thursday night my brothers at Ekklesiah supported Academia de Cesar Chavez during Math and Science Night. In exchange for a couple free slices, they gave a couple hours to serve juice and pizza and helped me provide childcare for families. While the selfless act of service alone is to be applauded, this night resonated with me on a deeper level too. My roommate Kaleb is onto something in his recent desires to share in the aspects of our lives outside the walls of Ekklesiah. It is because of serving together Thursday night that my roommates will now have visual images to connect to when I talk about my day at work. They can now recall a few of the kids I might mention on any given day. This is truly something special to me. To echo the prayers of my brothers here at Ekklesiah, keep praying that our relationships with one another would become more vulnerable and reach new depths of brotherhood. शांति.

Reconnecting (Its been way too long...)

[Tony] First off, I must apologize for my lack of writing as of late. If anything, I hope that it can be a testament to how filled and challenging life has been. When I say “challenging”, I mean it in a beautiful, revealing, life-giving, and empowering sort of way.
Lately, most of my attention has been devoted almost exclusively to three things: school, Ekklesiah, and work. I have been learning to see these three major elements of my life as “fuels” which allow for each to grow in and around me over time. For example: I must work so that I can continue to live here at Ekklesiah. So, in a way, work is fuel. Like fuel for my vehicle, I must make sure that there is enough fuel in my tank (or in my bank) in order to go where I want to go and do what I want to do. Ekklesiah keeps me working and I work so that I can continue to be part of this amazing, developing, and transformative community. It is here that I have found depths of joy, meaning, and fulfillment in ways that are deeper that any I have ever known. So, I keep chuggin through my 40 hour work weeks to “fuel” my tank.
Like my job fuels my life at Ekklesiah, Ekklesiah in itself is fuel and motivation to dedicate all of myself to my classes right now. This “fuel” actually goes two ways. First, because my heart is so invested and called to life and ministry at Ekklesiah, I have chosen to further my education so that I have even more to give of myself here. Ekklesiah fuels my desire and purpose at school. It keeps me focused. It keeps my school work relevant. And it is in this way that my classes also provide fuel for my life at Ekklesiah. I have learned so much, about the history of the church, the phases of development through generations of Christians, the old ideas that have become new ideas over and over again throughout the life of the church (like us!), how Christian ministry shapes itself in the face of extreme violence, poverty, and social issues, how the body can be most influential in these types of places, I have learned about leadership and how the leadership of Christ looks inverted when compared to the leadership of worldly leaders, and I have learned a great deal about hermeneutics, approaches to reading, interpreting, and contextualizing biblical literature. All of these things are little bits of fuel and I am able to come home every day trying to figure out how to use them, to test them, and to make what I have learned in class tangible in my own life, faith, leadership, and community.
I am extremely blessed with the opportunities that I have in my life. I am blessed by the amazing, loving, and intimate relationships I share with my brothers here at Ekklesiah, with my friends and classmates, with my church community (even if it has become spread over multiple congregations), and with my family. That being said, I also have made incredible strides as of late to conquer one of my biggest weaknesses: I have learned to recognize and accept the “defeat” of getting tired, overloaded, and stressed at times. I say it like this because before recently, I was the kind of person who recognized “being tired” as a defeat. Lately, I have been "defeated" a lot lately, working full time, full time grad school, and the passion I have for the ministry of Ekklesiah can be quite the ship to handle at times. I am an accomplisher. I have to be doing something. I have to be either working towards or finishing an objective. At the end of the day, the “success” of my day is determined by what I was or wasn't able to get done. The lessons I have learned: first, I am always going to be like this, and thats okay. Those that are closest to me know that I am driven and ambitious, and that is a strength that God has given me. However, lesson two: life is not about what you do or get done or accomplish, life is about the love that you give and receive, the relationships that you make and maintain, and the path that you walk in faith, all the while accomplishing what is asked of you for the Kingdom alongside those you love. And finally, lesson three: it is okay to be tired, to get drained, to be stressed, to feel small or overwhelmed. It is in these places that we experience some of our most basic and human elements. We find our mortality. We learn that we are finite and that there will always be a beginning and and end, to each day, to each year, and to our lives. We find our vulnerable places, coming face-to-face along the way the things that we aren't capable of, that we can't do (or at least all at once) or that we don't have the energy or time for. In deep ways, these are fearful places to step into. These can be scary places because it is in these places that we recognize the need we have for community, for others who surround us, who support us, and who are there when you are most “successful” and when you find yourself asleep, exhausted, on the couch with shoes still on you feet after a grueling day of work or week of study. We find a place in community where we are comfortable to do incredibly uncomfortable things. We learn to let go of our battles, the ones that we insist on fighting and winning alone, regardless if someone wants to help. We grow to be okay with losing control, depending on another for support that we need. We stand in the face of our own shortcomings, failures, and finite places. If we find ourselves in those places without community, we hide. We run away. We avoid having to recognize their truth. But in community, we can stand there, knowing that we are loved, knowing we are accepted, and knowing that we are never alone, because where my string of energy ends, my community is just beginning. It is when my energy runs out and my brothers at Ekklesiah come to me in my tiredness and ask what I need prayer for. It is when I make a mistake, or say something I don't really mean to a family member and they forgive me because they love me. It is when my church embraces me after 2 months away from worship services (because of work), choosing to be happy to see me instead of judgmental of why they don't see me more. This is community in its most tangible, naked, real, and practical sense. It is guiding me to grow into a deeper and more loving person than I could have ever been on my own.

Vulnerability

{Kaleb} God is good. I had to start with that because well obviously he is, but in my life I have to remind myself of that because I don't always feel like he is. This blog maybe a little scatter brained but stay with me. I have been having a really blahhhh time of late. I know it is because I havent been taking time for solitude. So pray that I do. I know that I have to work on being vulnerable and that is so hard for me, because I dont think to share my burdens or pains with anyone simply because I never have. I have always just kept it inside because I knew I could handle it. Why I am writing is i guess first of all to speak it out that I am going to work on becoming vulnerable, and I would appreciate anybody willing to pray for me.

Another thing that has been waying heavy on my heart is that in my relationships with people if there is ever a rift I have to be the one to reach out to repair it and I am feeling alot like I am the only one trying to change things and they are just expecting me to change to fit into their box. So pray I quit throwing pity parties for myself and that I realize its not all about me.

!!!SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT!!!
I am done being the person that everybody needs me to be. For so long I have been trying to be the person everyone needed me to be. I have realized that I cannot make everybody happy. That I cant be everything for everybody. I am going to make a pact with myself to put myself first. I am making a commitment to saying NO to things. I am adopting the 30-30 plan ive been preaching but not practicing. Finally and probably the most difficult. I am going to be vulnerable with God and work through the pain I have in calling him father or daddy. So pray for that as well.

I am so thankful that you people listen to my rants. I am more than greatful for the prayers.

(any suggestions for tuesdays w/ Kaleb????


Peace to your momma ship!!!

Love

KG

Losing my Virginity

{Kaleb} What's up Blog!!! So to our blog followers you will know that this is my first time posting (hence the title). I am super excited to inform you a little bit of what has been going on in my life and in our community through my eyes. First of all this last weekend I had the amazing opportunity to team teach with Jamie Racine @ winter white out. I believe that God showed up in some very powerful ways. A little background story to my favorite moment of the weekend. This past fall I had an awesome opportunity to coach volleyball at park high school along side Terry Foss. It was an awesome to get to know the girls, many of them started coming to 180. Alright back to the favorite part of my weekend. Two of the girls who were on my team, who were coming to 180 but just kind of there not really participating to much. Were crying and I went and prayed with them, than Katie Mooty came over and she actually was able to pray with them to accept Christ. Which in itself was awesome!!! Sunday morning we provided an opportunity to students to get baptized if they wanted too. James and I were in the pool. I was able to baptize roughly around 20 some students. Including many of the girls on the volleyball team. Which has to be one of the most awesome God moments in my life. Just to be able to be apart of it was awesome. Praise God!

Now around the home front. Pray for us! It has been pretty frustrating for me lately around here. Just as a house us not really doing much. I know its not about doing more stuff but at the same time I don't view that as an excuse to not do anything. So pray that God would stir us to movement.

Pray for the community as a whole. We will be going through some major changes throughout the spring and summer, pray that God would continue to speak to us that we would know what to do and that God would make it clear as to who is suppose to live here, and once we find out that, how we can best serve each other, Dayton's Bluff, and the Church body as a whole.

Pray for the Carlson Family their was a tragic accident with their son being accidently ran over by a car. Josiah was two years old.

A little treat for you guys I will be starting Video Blogs every tuesday throughout the year here on our blog so you can all look forward to Tuesdays With Kaleb.


Shalom

Kaleb

[Nathanial] Nothing extremely profound today. Trying something simple. There are moments in life when one gets an opportunity to step back and reflect on the AWESOMENESS of God. Here are a couple of those moments from my life the past month.

what a week

[Nathanial] Time to write out some of the things and experiences on my heart this past week. It has been a week of smiles and a week filled with emotion-wrenching news. I feel comfortable sharing some these situations because I feel that any prayer that can be lifted up is beneficial. Here are some of the stories of my week:
Monday I learned that a student I work with is dealing with an immigration hearing for his father. The family remains in Mexico despite school starting two weeks ago because the family can’t afford to travel separately. It is easy to feel helpless because there really isn’t anything I can do as an educator. It is my current goal to do my best once the student finally returns to classes. Lord, I pray for this family’s situation and their safe travels.
Tuesday I heard news that a coworker is discovering her second battle with cancer. Lord, I pray for that family and especially their two children.
Then today I learned that a Luther graduate has been confirmed dead as a result of the earthquake in Haiti. While I didn’t know this man personally, the loss remains tragic and ripples can be felt through other people. Lord I pray for the country of Haiti and all the families affected directly and indirectly.
Despite all these sorrowful events, it has been my birthday week. There has been many smiles and wonderful moments of love from the people that really care about me. I turned 24 and a wise man said to me, “24 is a big year.” While I initially scoffed at this, I am sure God has some amazing things in store for my life this year.
I woke up today and thought “I just want to skip the hours of my workday and get straight to tonight to spend time with my communal brothers.” Indeed, the Spirit of God is floating among these quiet walls tonight. Today, living in this place was worded with a slightly different meaning. We are each the best thing and the worst thing for one another. We can support one another deeply and challenge one another deeply. There is no better place for any one of us than within these walls in this season of our individual lives.
Thank you Lord for being ever present. Thank you for Lord being a source of comfort and strength deeper than any of us could ever fathom. paix.

Love

[Tony] In light of the new year, I'd like to partake in the almost cliché tradition of using the year transition as an opportunity to reflect on the year that has passed. Now, I realize I could talk for a long time about all of the different things and people and events and surprises and successes and failures and whatever else happened this last year, but I wont do that. Actually, I would fear that trying to recount everything would just set me up to leave something out and feel bad about it afterwards. Anyway, I'd like to reflect on this last year by talking about a deep and resounding truth that I have learned over the course of interaction with God and life over the last twelve months.
Living in an incarnational community like Ekklesiah has exposed me to a place of vulnerability. This vulnerability and allowing yourself to be vulnerable while asking others to open up to you is a place that is very frightening to dwell too long in. Its a potentially painful place, a place where control is given completely away and the need for God's tangible presence is a desperate one. This is one of those fragile places, one of those places that, for the most part, if someone ends up there its by accident. I'll admit, this is sometimes a difficult and frustrating place to be- frustrating in that lay yourself completely in the hands of God and one another but also frustrating because it will expose you. This is a place where weakness comes out in bold colors, where brokenness, past pains, and struggle stand hand-in-hand with your strengths and all you can do is stand there with your own baggage and ask to be loved.
Vulnerability is also a place that exposes our own humanity. It is in vulnerability, in those intimate and others-seeking relationships where humanity becomes the beautiful, priceless gift that it is. Here, people change from friends and acquaintances to image bearers and icons. And it is here that the marks of our Creator, even in our most broken and cracked states, shine brightest. It is here that we learn about ourselves and in learning about ourselves, we learn about our God. So, here are some things that I have learned in those scary but rewarding relational places over the last year. I'll just throw them out there and I'll let you chew on them-- because sometimes discovery is the best part.
First- Every human being is created with an incredible, natural, and endless ability to love and to be loved.
Second- We are incredibly relational creatures. Like food and water and sleep, if we don't have relationship we don't have life. Literally.
Third- We need each other desperately- Quite possibly the greatest gift that God could have given to us was each other. Alone, we are weak, stubborn, scared and easily misled, but together- together, in relationship, we can hold and build each other up to places we could never go alone. How wonderful it is that we were created by God in such a way that we actually physically, emotionally, and spiritually need love and need to love desperately in order to survive. We were created to be in love! How wonderful it is that we can share with each other the same love that is poured out on us by our maker. Suddenly, when you pay more attention to these details of being human, even the painful sides of love become beautiful in their own way. For children of God, to live is to love and to be loved, which means love or a need for love will pervade everything and every part of our lives, in some way, shape, or form. Sometimes that love is messy, sometimes its sloppy, sometimes its neglected, other times its desperately needed and sought after. Its the every day love, the “I really just need someone to talk to” love, the “I don't know what to do” love, the “I messed up” love. Its the “I'm so glad you made it” love and its the “I miss you” love. Its the “that hurt” love and its the “I'm sorry” love. Its the “forgive them father for they know not what they do” love and the “for God so loved the world” love. We are inundated with it. We cannot escape it. We cannot live without it. We need it in our cores. There will never be a time when we don't have it. This is the world that God has created for us to live in and this is the way that God has created us to live- to be, eternally, in love.
And then, theres this- God is love. So, we are inundated with God. Even if we weren't Christians. Even if we didn't even belief in Him, we could not live without Him. Literally. He is breath, He is Spirit, and He is love- and we cannot live without Him.
Happy New Year- May God bless you with grace and peace in the upcoming year.